let the records state that...

leaving evidence. that’s what we’re doing, right? i know i am. every day spent on working up the metaphorical ladder of life, fumbling for the next step, but somehow looking ahead and finding the next bit to hold onto.

this place is my evidence. let the records state that 8 april 2019 is the day things begin falling into place. i have spent so much of myself on things that do not fulfill me, do not fix me, do not even fit me. so much of chaos, wasted on people, things, ideas that have yet to blossom any truths. only lies.
this place shall hold my fears. and my flaws. and banter about the dumbest thoughts known to man. and this place shall know peace. and truth. and the most profound lies. and accepted lies. and unacceptable truths. and journeys beyond usual perceivable measure.
this place shall speak of homes that are not people, or places, but moments, moments you keep going back to, as if rehearsing for a natural deja-vu, even as you know that what you shall find for yourself shall at best be a jamais vu.
let that sink in.
this is my evidence. the record that i am moving closer to leaving a trail worth following, a story that makes me human. a story i needn’t sell for things like sympathy or love or admiration. a story i can call my own.

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